Thursday, February 11, 2010
Hey guys—
I want to write this blog today because I’m lethargically bored at work, (I don’t know if you can grammatically connect those two words, but I did, because that’s how I feel) and I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I have been wrestling with how I want to say this, if I even should say it, with what people are going to think of me if I even bring it up. It’s not that I’m mad, or that I feel like I need vengeance or anything ridiculous like that. I honestly understand the situation, and just want to be understood. That’s all I guess.
I’m coming from a place of total respect and humility, and my hope is that you will read what I’m going to write with an open heart to what I feel I should say.
When I first started doing COR 8 years ago, things were different. Back then, there were maybe five people helping out on kitchen crew, who were responsible for themselves. There weren’t themed meals, there weren’t weird costumes or funny wigs, or people greeting you as you went to eat a meal. There were some pretty violent name tag games though.
I know there are a lot of people that aren’t very happy with the way that I’m doing things. Bleh. There I said it. I didn’t want to say it because I feel like you guys are going to think I’m mad or something and I’m not. I get it. I’ve been expecting it. Fr. G told me to brace myself for it. Does it bother me? Of course it bothers me! It would bother anybody. But I just want to you guys to understand why I’ve been doing some of the things I’ve been doing.
I am absolutely petrified. Bleh. There, I said that, too. I mean, think about it. One day, I’m just little old me, with no huge responsibilities, and then boom, the next day I’m in charge of almost 100 kids, who are all together in the same place, doing different things! I feel like the parent of a toddler! (Not to say that you guys act like toddlers, just to say that parents of toddlers are a lil bit overprotective.) I’m always thinking, “what if someone falls in the pond? What if someone gets hit by a train? What if someone gets lost in the woods and then the white man comes out and gets her? What if someone chokes? Can I do the Heimlich? Do I have to be certified to do the Heimlich? AH!” I worry about you guys. I’ve changed some rules about kitchen crew because I want to protect your safety. I don’t want your parents to kill me.
And I want to be fair. I couldn’t even play favorites if I tried because in a way, you guys are all my favorites.
I love COR. I mean, it changes people, and I love watching teens transform and open their hearts to God on the weekend. I feel like there’s always this weird shift in focus when people come back for kitchen crew. I mean, sometimes we say and do things that don’t reflect our Christian values. I’m not pointing the finger, either. I am just as guilty. But we are supposed to be Christ to others! We are supposed to grow in holiness! I don’t want to get all preachy on you and stuff, but in Romans chapter 12, Paul talks about the marks of a true Christian; “Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; love one another with mutual affection; outdo one another in showing honor. Do not lag in zeal, be ardent in spirit. Serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in suffering, persevere in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints; extend hospitality to strangers. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice. Weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly; do not claim to be wiser than you are. Do not repay evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all.”
I feel like if we don’t do that, then all of the work that we’ve done will be in vain. I want us to grow closer to Christ together. That is my prayer for you guys. So that’s why there has been an added emphasis on service and prayer on the kitchen crew side of things.
I mean, I know that I could write all day. But if take only one thing from this blog, I hope that it is this: I care so deeply about the COR family. Every thing that I have done to “change” some of the regulations on COR has been done out of my sincere love for COR. I want to see it succeed. I want it to be a place where Christ comes first always. I want you to be safe. I want you to be happy.
Please don’t ever feel like you can’t vocalize your concerns to me about things like this. I want to hear what you guys have to say. If I do something, and you hate it, let me know! I don’t want you to hate things! I want this to be something that we work at together. I want to hear about your dreams for COR. This isn’t MY program. This is God’s program first, and yours second. I’m just the little person that helps you guys out. So let me know! Email me! Call me! Text me! Stop by my office! I get lonely there!
Ok! I have to go to a meeting! I don’t know why I keep using exclamation points!
Peace of Christ to you!
Molly
I want to write this blog today because I’m lethargically bored at work, (I don’t know if you can grammatically connect those two words, but I did, because that’s how I feel) and I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I have been wrestling with how I want to say this, if I even should say it, with what people are going to think of me if I even bring it up. It’s not that I’m mad, or that I feel like I need vengeance or anything ridiculous like that. I honestly understand the situation, and just want to be understood. That’s all I guess.
I’m coming from a place of total respect and humility, and my hope is that you will read what I’m going to write with an open heart to what I feel I should say.
When I first started doing COR 8 years ago, things were different. Back then, there were maybe five people helping out on kitchen crew, who were responsible for themselves. There weren’t themed meals, there weren’t weird costumes or funny wigs, or people greeting you as you went to eat a meal. There were some pretty violent name tag games though.
I know there are a lot of people that aren’t very happy with the way that I’m doing things. Bleh. There I said it. I didn’t want to say it because I feel like you guys are going to think I’m mad or something and I’m not. I get it. I’ve been expecting it. Fr. G told me to brace myself for it. Does it bother me? Of course it bothers me! It would bother anybody. But I just want to you guys to understand why I’ve been doing some of the things I’ve been doing.
I am absolutely petrified. Bleh. There, I said that, too. I mean, think about it. One day, I’m just little old me, with no huge responsibilities, and then boom, the next day I’m in charge of almost 100 kids, who are all together in the same place, doing different things! I feel like the parent of a toddler! (Not to say that you guys act like toddlers, just to say that parents of toddlers are a lil bit overprotective.) I’m always thinking, “what if someone falls in the pond? What if someone gets hit by a train? What if someone gets lost in the woods and then the white man comes out and gets her? What if someone chokes? Can I do the Heimlich? Do I have to be certified to do the Heimlich? AH!” I worry about you guys. I’ve changed some rules about kitchen crew because I want to protect your safety. I don’t want your parents to kill me.
And I want to be fair. I couldn’t even play favorites if I tried because in a way, you guys are all my favorites.
I love COR. I mean, it changes people, and I love watching teens transform and open their hearts to God on the weekend. I feel like there’s always this weird shift in focus when people come back for kitchen crew. I mean, sometimes we say and do things that don’t reflect our Christian values. I’m not pointing the finger, either. I am just as guilty. But we are supposed to be Christ to others! We are supposed to grow in holiness! I don’t want to get all preachy on you and stuff, but in Romans chapter 12, Paul talks about the marks of a true Christian; “Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; love one another with mutual affection; outdo one another in showing honor. Do not lag in zeal, be ardent in spirit. Serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in suffering, persevere in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints; extend hospitality to strangers. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice. Weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly; do not claim to be wiser than you are. Do not repay evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all.”
I feel like if we don’t do that, then all of the work that we’ve done will be in vain. I want us to grow closer to Christ together. That is my prayer for you guys. So that’s why there has been an added emphasis on service and prayer on the kitchen crew side of things.
I mean, I know that I could write all day. But if take only one thing from this blog, I hope that it is this: I care so deeply about the COR family. Every thing that I have done to “change” some of the regulations on COR has been done out of my sincere love for COR. I want to see it succeed. I want it to be a place where Christ comes first always. I want you to be safe. I want you to be happy.
Please don’t ever feel like you can’t vocalize your concerns to me about things like this. I want to hear what you guys have to say. If I do something, and you hate it, let me know! I don’t want you to hate things! I want this to be something that we work at together. I want to hear about your dreams for COR. This isn’t MY program. This is God’s program first, and yours second. I’m just the little person that helps you guys out. So let me know! Email me! Call me! Text me! Stop by my office! I get lonely there!
Ok! I have to go to a meeting! I don’t know why I keep using exclamation points!
Peace of Christ to you!
Molly
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Well. I think I may have figured out how to work this thing. Ha. I emailed Fr. G, asking him for help, and his response (which is currently my Facebook status) made me laugh: ""Good day, Molly! What the heck, YOU, a child of technology, are asking ME, a total geek in the field, about how to proceed with a blog?"I hope that when I publish this, it will post to the website. I have been kind of scared about doing anything here. I have often times felt unworthy to be involved in this ministry in this capacity, and I am always afraid of saying anything. Perhaps that is the devil playing his cards with me. When we act on our feelings of unworthiness, we don't allow God's grace to take control. Like it says in Isaiah 61:
1 The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,2 to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,3 and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.
He doesn't say that to just me. He says it to all of us. How cool would it be if we all lived as God has called us? I guess that's my way of saying that even if I feel unworthy, God asked me to do it. So, alright God. I'll do it.
Anyway. This is really just supposed to be a tester blog, I guess. I honestly have no idea if its going to work and publish to the website like I'd like it to. I am very lucky that I get to figure these things out by myself. It's like a little adventure every day!
I am a huge fan of music, and I like to share the stuff that I like. Today... a little Phil Wickham is just what I need to start off this beautiful, snowy day. :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGYadYHnQCU
Peace to you.
Molly
